Give Directions

Have you ever actually listened to a woman give directions? It sounds something like this:

Uh...Elm Street. I think my pediatrician used to be near there. Oh, wait, that was Elm Ave. Um....ok, you go down this street, and make a left, right? Right. But it's kind of like going straight...and I always end up missing it whenever I'm not paying attention, but there's a gas station on other side of the road behind the brick building - you can't see it until you pass Elm though.

Painful. Physically painful listening to girl's give directions.

Men should know how to do it - or know how to fake it. Let's first assume you don't know where they are headed. It's easy. You point them in the direction of the nearest major road. Make sure it's far enough away that you don't risk them coming back and calling your bluff. It's a win, win - you get a good laugh, and they get to tell people about the jackass who sent them the wrong way.

Now let's assume you do know the way. Men have a connection women can never understand. It's called common sense. Women have no clue what this is.

Here's a man giving directions to a man:

Go up to the stop sign - hang a left. Take that to the light - hang a ralph. Keep on that until you see the Hooters; then make the next left.

Here's a man giving directions to a woman:

Go down this street until you see signs for the highway - follow that.